tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9926676.post112489707967189197..comments2023-08-29T01:58:24.749-07:00Comments on Funny Love Quotes, Famous Inspirational Short Sayings, Life, Poem, Cute, Movie, Friendship: Short Funny Quotes by Chris Rock. Daily QuotesJayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11304903199705597496noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9926676.post-1124903260277953622005-08-24T10:07:00.000-07:002005-08-24T10:07:00.000-07:00what about po moma........Yo mama's like a pirate,...what about po moma........<BR/><BR/>Yo mama's like a pirate, there she blows<BR/>Yo mama is so fat she has three shirt sizes, jumbo, humongus, and "OH <BR/>MY GOD IT'S COMING TOWARDS US!!"<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so poor i saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing she said moving.<BR/>Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed with her to see how long she slept.<BR/>Yo mama's so damn stupid on a job application it said "sex" and she wrote Monday wednesday and sometimes friday.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Paris and Rico walked into the locker room holding his side and bending over. Paris says "ow man im so sore" Dario asks " whats wrong?" Paris replies " man yo mama was rough last night" Rico adds " she needs to loosen up"<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama such a dirty whore that they're having to paternity test the whole state of Texas just to find out who yo daddy is!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamma so old that in the back seat of your car, kids don't say 'Are we there yet', they scream, 'Is she Dead yet!'<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamas so hairy wen u were born u almost died of rugburn<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama smells so bad, when she went to make friends with a skunk, the skunk got hit by a truck on purpose!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a bathroom and nearly pissed her <BR/>pants<BR/>Yo mama so fat her logo is "we are family, burger king, mc donalds and<BR/>me..."<BR/>Yo mama so fat she has all the food caterers on speed dial<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama is so big she tripped over wal-mart and landed on target and evey time she passes by the t.v. i miss a seoson of friends<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your mommas so old someone told her to act her age and she died<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so poor that when i stepped on a cigarette she cried, hey, who turned off the heater.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your sister is so ugly she reminds me of your mom.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamma so ugly, yo daddy would rather kiss her ass before going work everyday<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your moms so ugly the mailman mistacked her as the dog.<BR/><BR/><BR/>You mama so fat she stepped on an airplane and it turned into a submarine<BR/><BR/><BR/>This is a fact, yo mama's breath Is wack, she needs a tic, not a tac, but the whole damn pack<BR/>I don't mean to be mean, but yo mama needs listerine, not a sip, not a swallow, but the whole damn bottle.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mama's teeth are so yellow, cars slow down when she smiles!<BR/>Yo Mama's breath is so bad, she made a tic tac run away!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your jokes are so corny that the corns on your toes got jealous.<BR/>Yo mama so ugly when she looked out the window she was arrested for 1st degree murder.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama like a fast food restaraunt - quick and easy!!!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo moma is so fat when it rains she uses a highway for a slip 'n' slide<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamma so damn fat that when she traveled back to the dinosaur times and she took a step the dinosaurs said what the hell is happing...oh shit its a real damn earthquake.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your mama so stupid when she saw a kid dress as a devil in halloween she thouth she was in hell <BR/><BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Momma's so ugly, even Sloth from the Goonies wouldn't date her.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama like a shotgun - five cocks and shes loaded<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mamma so damn ugly she makes Anne Ramsey look like J Lo.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo' mamma so ugly she got arrested for vandalizing a mirror shop.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid she put a peep hole in a glass door<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama like nascar - two rubbers and shes ready to ride.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama's so ugly, she made a blind man cry!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamma so old, fat and hairy, that when she took you to the zoo the zookeepers thought a silverback Gorilla had abducted you!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so fat, that when u were born, they had 2 send out a search party to find ya!<BR/><BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama soooo ugly, she works as a double for Saddam Hussein.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo moma so stupid if she would to speak her mind she would be speachless<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama soooo poor she can't even pay attention!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo kid brother so damn ugly that the kids at school have started saying, "Hey Gollum, give us your autograph"<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so0o0o fat, one day she walked out with a yellow rain jacket on and the children began yelling, "Hey, the School Bus is here!"<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so0o0o fat, she takes baths in the Atlantic Ocean<BR/><BR/><BR/>Listen buddy, your mommy is so freakin dumb that if you told her pappa was a rolling stone, she'd tell her momma to put mick jagger on child support!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Momma so damn fat the Police where going to use her as an emergency air mattress when Michael Jackson started dangling his baby.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Hey, yo momma so damn fat when her beeper goes off people turn around to see if she is backin up!!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo moma so fat when she wears a yellow rain coat all the people yell "taxi" <BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama's so damn fat that when she was kidnapped her face covered every side of the milk carton!<BR/><BR/><BR/>You so ugly when a friend walked you into school the teachers said sorry no pets aloud!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your Mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the super bowl.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mama's so damn ugly that she turned your dad gay.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama's so bald, Mr. Clean got jealous.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Hey, your Momma is so sluttie I'd call her a hoe but hoes' get paid.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mamas so damn greasy that she has to use bacon for a bandaid.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo' mama so dumb she got locked inside Matress World and slept on the floor.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yomomma so hairy that when she puts her arm to her side it looks like she has Don King in a headlock.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid that she got stabbed in a shoot out.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so fat that when she went to sea world the little kids ran away and told their parents that a whale escaped.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo' Mamma is so fat she uses a VHS as a beeper!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid she sat on the tv and watched the couch.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo' Mamma is so fat she uses a VHS as a beeper!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Your mama's so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mama so damn old she used to Gang Bang with the Flintstones and had an affair with Captain Caveman.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mamas so fat she shoved a battery up her ass and yelled "I got the Power!".<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid and clumsy, she got tangled in a cordless phone.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama soooo fat, she put on a yellow dress and the kids thought she was the school bus.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo' Sista's just like a like a Popsicle - everybody wants a fuckin lick!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Mamma's so hairy she just got an armpit trim and lost 20 pounds!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo Moma sooooo ugly, I could have been yo Daddy but the dog beat me under the fence!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo momma is soooooo stupid, she wears a t-shirt that says "hukd on fonicks woorkd fo mi"<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mam like a screen door - after a couple of bangs she tends to loosen up.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama is so fat she sat on a rainbow and made Skittles!<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama so stupid she puts a ruler on her pillow to see how long she slept<BR/><BR/><BR/>I heard that Yo mama is on the warpath - she lost a finger and now can't count past 9...<BR/><BR/>Yo mama so nasty when she masterbates, she gets arrested for cruelty to animals.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Yo mama's blind and is seeing another man.<BR/><BR/>Yo mama's glasses are so damn thick she can see into the future.<BR/><BR/>Yo mama's so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.<BR/><BR/>You gotta tell yo moma to stop changing lipstick color - I'm now getting a freakin Rainbow on my d**k!<BR/><BR/>Yo sista so damn stupid on her last job application where it said 'Sex?' she marked "M, F, and occasionally on a Thursday too.."<BR/><BR/>You' big brother so damn stupid that on his last job application, under emergency contact he put 999 (911).<BR/><BR/>Yo mam is so stupid - I just aks her about her X-Men and she said: "Well, my first baby's daddy was Jimmy...and I still see Johnny on Fridays...."<BR/><BR/>Yo Grannie so stupid she thought Sherlock Holmes was a housing project.<BR/><BR/>Yo Mother in law's teeth are so yellow, Dorothy and Toto thought it was the Yellow Brick Road.<BR/><BR/>Yo Momma's like a Snickers bar - packed full with with nuts.<BR/><BR/>Yo ex-girlfriend's like Humpty Dumpty... first she gets humped, then she gets dumped.<BR/><BR/>Yo mama's like a race car driver...she burns a lot of rubbers...<BR/><BR/>Yo Auntie just like the Suez Canal - Vessels full of Seamen passing through everyday...<BR/><BR/>Yo gilfriends's afro so damb big, when the bitch got in my car everyone thought I had tinted windows.<BR/><BR/>Yo Mama ass so huge she take up 5 rows in the cinema...<BR/><BR/>Yo Papa's so short, he tried to commit suicide with a pin.<BR/><BR/>Yo Grannie's so enormous that when she went to the drycleaners to hand in her underwear, they put up a sign - 'NO PARACHUTES ALLOWED'<BR/><BR/>You Biology teacher so freakin stupid she thinks that DNA is the National Dyslexics Association.<BR/><BR/>Yo' best friend so idiotic she thoughtt Menopause was a button on her walkman.<BR/><BR/>You Momma so fat and stupid that her waist is bigger than her I.Q.<BR/><BR/>Tell Yo' girlfriend my Dog wanna know how much he owes her for last night...<BR/><BR/>Yo' papa so damn strange that he invented a water-proof teabag.<BR/><BR/>Yo mother in law so bald that when she put on a sweater, folk thought she was a roll on deoderant!<BR/><BR/>Did you know flies were given wings so that they could beat yo mama to the dump?<BR/><BR/>I heard yo house was made out of bog paper - why? cuz your whole family full of crap!<BR/><BR/>Yo kid brother so fat and ugly Peter Jackson offered him the part of the Cave Troll in lord of the rings<BR/><BR/>You Nose so damn big that we use yer snotters as Footballs.<BR/><BR/>Yo Momma so mad that she even made Kurt Russell escape from LA.<BR/><BR/>Yo Nana so ghetto she washes paper plates.<BR/><BR/>Oi, yo need to tell you mama to stop wearing the blue lipstick...I got balls like a smurf now!<BR/><BR/>You so skinny, you turned sideways and disappeared.<BR/><BR/>Yo mama's so bald, when she braids her hair, it remind me of stitches.<BR/><BR/>Yo Mama so fat when she steps on a scale it reads "One at a time, please".<BR/><BR/>Yo mama so fat and stupid that she was fired from Forrest Gump cuz she kept eating the box of chocolates.<BR/><BR/>Yo Sista so fat the National Weather Agency assigns names to her farts.<BR/><BR/>Yo Mama so poor that she uses tumbleweed as a Xmas tree.<BR/><BR/>You Mommy so hairy she's got afros on her nipples.<BR/><BR/>Yo' mama breath so disgustingly bad that she needs Freshmints with batteries in it<BR/><BR/>Yo Papa's like an old arcade machine - toss in a quarter and you can play with his joystick.<BR/><BR/>Yo mama such a bitch, she interned for Clinton.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com