Short Funny Quotes

All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
Sean O Casey Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Love Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes


We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones.
Francois de La Rochefoucauld Short Funny Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes


Washington is the only place where sound travels faster than light
- CVR Thompson Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Funny Sayings

Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes

There are two kinds of light--the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.
- James Thurber Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Funny Quotes


Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked 'Brightness,' but it doesn't work.
- Gallagher Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes, Short Funny Quotes


Saying what we think gives us a wider conversational range than saying what we know.
- Cullen Hightower Inspirational Quotes, Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Funny Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

Famous Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Sayings

Not being able to do everything is no excuse for not doing everything you can.

- Ashleigh Brilliant Famous Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Sayings, Quotations

Famous Quotes on Life, Funny Quotes, Inspirational, Motivational

When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?"

-Sydney J. Harris Famous Quotes, Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Quotations

Motivational Quotes

A man sees in the world what he carries in his heart.

- Opening scene of "Faust" - Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Famous Quotes



The only job where you start at the top, is digging a hole.

- unknown Motivational Quotes, Famous Quotes, Inspirational Quotes



The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think, say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... The only thing we can do is play on the string we have, and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.
- Charles Swindoll Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Famous Quotes, Quotations

Motivational Quotes

A man sees in the world what he carries in his heart.

- Opening scene of "Faust" - Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Famous Quotes


The only job where you start at the top, is digging a hole.

- unknown Motivational Quotes, Famous Quotes, Inspirational Quotes



The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think, say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... The only thing we can do is play on the string we have, and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.

- Charles Swindoll Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Famous Quotes, Quotations

Inspirational Quotes

It is not the critic who counts,
nor the man who points out how the strong man stumbled,
or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly;
who errs and comes short again and again;
who knows great enthusiasms, great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly,
so that his place shall never be with those timid souls
who know neither victory nor defeat.

- Theodore Roosevelt Inpirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Famous Quotes


It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.

Voltaire Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes

Funny Quotes

My sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!

Funny Quotes by Sarah Silverman.


I knew these Siamese twins. They moved to England, so the other one could drive.

Steven Wright Funny Quotes


If I ever have twins, I'd use one for parts.

Funny Quotes by Steven Wright


My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other -- so now it's just a waiting game.

Bill Dwyer Funny Quotes

Daily Quotes

What this country needs is more free speech worth listening to.

- Hansell B. Duckett Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes

Famous Quotes

In case you're worried about what's going to become of the younger generation, it's going to grow up and start worrying about the younger generation.

- Roger Allen Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes

Famous Quotes

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

- Plato Famous Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes

Movie Quotes

Movie Quotes

This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes


Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes


You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes



It's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes


The things you own end up owning you.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes



We're consumers. We are by-products of a lifestyle obsession. Murder, crime, poverty, these things don't concern me. What concerns me are celebrity magazines, television with 500 channels, some guy's name on my underwear. Rogaine, Viagra, Olestra.

Movie Quotes – Fight Club, Funny Movie Quotes, Great Movie Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Motivational, Inspirational

Albert Einstein Quotes. Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes

Great Albert Einstein Quotes. Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes

A photograph never grows old. You and I change, people change all through the months and years, but a photograph always remains the same. How nice to look at a photograph of mother or father taken many years ago. You see them as you remember them. But as people live on, they change completely. That is why I think a photograph can be kind.

Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Funny Quotes, Motivational, Inspirational

Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Motivational, Inspirational, Famous

If there were in the world today any large number of people who desired their own happiness more than they desired the unhappiness of others, we could have paradise in a few years.

- Bertrand Russell Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Quotes

Famous Movie Quotes

Famous Movie Quotes, Funny Movie Quotes

Our comedies are not to be laughed at.
~ Samuel Goldwyn Famous Movie Quotes, "Funny Movie Quotes"

Movies can and do have tremendous influence in shaping young lives in the realm of entertainment towards the ideals and objectives of normal adulthood.
~ Walt Disney "Famous Movie Quotes", Funny Movie Quotes

No form of art goes beyond ordinary consciousness as film does, straight to our emotions, deep into the twilight of the soul.
~ Ingrid Bergman Famous Movie Quotes, Funny Movie Quotes

A film is never really any good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet.
~ Orson Welles Famous Movie Quotes, Funny Movie Quotes

A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.
~ Alfred Hitchcock Famous Movie Quotes, Funny Movie Quotes

This film cost $31 million. With that kind of money I could have invaded some country.
~ Clint Eastwood "Famous Movie Quotes", Funny Movie Quotes

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.
~ Bette Davis Famous Movie Quotes, "Funny Movie Quotes"

Politics Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes, Inspirational, Motivational

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book.

- Ronald Reagan

Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Daily Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Motivational, Inspirational Quotes

Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.

- Henry Ford (1863-1947) Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Motivational Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes

Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes. Short Funny Quotes

Man is so made that he can only find relaxation from one kind of labor by taking up another.
- Anatole France Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Funny Quotes



The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it.
- Doris Day Daily Quotes, Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Love Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes on Experience. Short Funny Quotes

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
-Funny Quotes by Barry LePatner. Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Motivational and Inspirational Quotes


Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste that they hurry past it.
- Funny Quotes by Soren Kierkegaard. Famous Quotes, "Short Funny Quotes", Famous Quotes, Motivational and Inspirational Quotes

Funny Quotes on Experience. Short Funny Quotes

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
-Funny Quotes by Barry LePatner. Short Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Motivational and Inspirational Quotes


Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste that they hurry past it.
- Funny Quotes by Soren Kierkegaard. Famous Quotes, "Short Funny Quotes", Famous Quotes, Motivational and Inspirational Quotes

Short Funny Quotes on Bush. Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes

Just imagine how President Bush would write the traditional back-to-school assignment, What I Did On My Summer Vacation: My five weeks on the ranch started with an angry war mom exciting the farm animals (the press corps), and ended with New Orleans turning into a swamp. So I guess I'd have to quote the old joke about what they said to Mrs. Lincoln: "Other than that, how was the theater?"
Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Short Funny Quotes

Government - Short Funny Quotes, Daily Quotes, Famous Quotes

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, its just the opposite.
- John Kenneth Galbraith Funny Quotes, Famous Quotes, Daily Quotes, Short Funny Quotes